A Governess in the Duke’s Arms (Preview)

Chapter One

Pellington, England

1819

 

“I’m just going out riding, Kane,” Colin said as he took his hat and gloves from the butler. “Don’t wait around for me. Just carry on as normal.”

“Of course, Your Grace.” Kane paused when giggling floated through the air and reached their ears. “Do you want me to tell Miss Emily where you’ve gone?”

“If she asks, simply say I’ve gone out. Remember the last time I said I was going out riding?”

“Fair point.” Kane bowed to him. “I’ll make sure she’s not aware, Your Grace.”

Colin was grateful for that. The last time he had gone out riding, Emily had found out what he was doing and wanted to come along. She loved horses, but her mother hadn’t wanted her to start riding just yet. There was plenty of time for that, so Emily hadn’t even sat on a horse. Now her parents were dead, and Colin knew he should get Emily to have riding lessons. But not right now.

He was still coming to terms with the fact that his sister was gone and was never coming back. Thinking about anything that involved sorting out the little girl who was now under his guardianship felt somewhat overwhelming.

Selfish, yes. Colin had someone else to think about now, and he couldn’t be selfish with it. But he was terrified about what he was meant to do with a six-year-old little girl when he hadn’t been around small children since he was a child himself. This wasn’t meant to happen at all. Sally and Paul Weston were supposed to be alive and well, and they should be raising Emily right now. Not him.

This wasn’t right.

“I won’t be long,” Colin said, clearing his throat as he headed for the front door. “I’ll be on my usual route.”

“Very good, Your Grace.”

There would be time to give Emily riding lessons. Just not today. Colin needed to get a hold of some semblance in his life for a little bit longer. Then, he would figure out what he was supposed to do.

How was this all meant to happen now? Colin hadn’t planned for this eventuality, believing that his sister and husband would still be around and raising Emily as they wished. It had been two weeks since Emily had come to live with him, and Colin was still trying to get used to the fact he was about to be in charge of a child. He didn’t know how he was meant to grieve and raise a child at the same time. Why was his life turning out like this?

At least Emily seemed to be doing alright at the moment. She had moments where she cried and sobbed for her mother as she tried to fall asleep, but Colin was surprised at the sudden bouts of happiness. His maid, Eloise, seemed to have figured out that Emily needed a distraction and was constantly looking for ways to distract the little girl. If Emily ended up being sad, Eloise diverted her attention elsewhere. She was very good with the child.

Colin just hoped that it would be the same with him. It would get too much otherwise.

Heading into the courtyard and entering the stables, Colin waited for his horse to be saddled and ready. As he waited, he caught sight of one of the stable lads talking to one of the younger maids, fetching water from the well. She giggled as he said something to her, her cheeks blushing as she put a hand to her mouth. Then both saw that Colin was looking at them and they broke apart, the pair appearing to be embarrassed as they hurried away in opposite directions. Colin couldn’t help smiling at the sight of it. To be young and in love, it had to be beautiful.

Then again, he was still considered young. He was in his mid-twenties, so he should still think of himself similarly. But he wasn’t in love with anyone, not lately. It just seemed like too much hassle on top of everything else. Colin had decided just to let it happen when it did instead of actively looking for it, and it hadn’t come to him yet.

That would have to change shortly; Colin was certain of that. When his mother returned from the Americas at Christmas, she would make it her mission to find Colin a husband and ensure he had heirs within a year of getting married. Colin wasn’t too interested in all of that, but he knew that the dowager duchess was going to be insistent on it all, from finding an appropriate wife and having several children, including an heir, to taking over the dukedom should anything happen to Colin.

Colin didn’t want to think about any of that. It had been four years since he had become the duke after his father’s untimely death, and he had barely entered his twenties. Becoming a duke at that age had not been a part of his consideration. To think about having children now to ensure that the dukedom wouldn’t leave the immediate family didn’t sit well with him. Somehow, it kept reminding Colin of his own mortality.

He had wanted to get used to things on his own and go at a pace that was most comfortable to him. With his mother moving abroad, she wasn’t there every day to breathe down his neck and tell him what to do, but Colin would often get so many letters that it was almost like she was in the next room. Four years had passed since Lady Pellington had left the country to get away from the pain of losing her husband, the Duke of Pellington, and soon she would be returning. Then Colin would have his mother telling him that he needed to do his duty every day

He loved his mother, but she was exhausting. Although Colin couldn’t really complain about it. After losing her husband four years ago and now her daughter a few weeks ago, Colin knew that the dowager duchess would be scared about losing him, too. He wondered if he wrote and asked her to return now that she would actually do it. Colin had never raised children, so he had no idea what was meant to go into it. But from her last letter, his mother believed he could do it, and if his sister and brother-in-law thought he could look after Emily, he should have the confidence to do it on his own.

Colin didn’t think he would ever be confident about raising a child. Just like when told that he was inheriting the dukedom from his father far earlier than he anticipated. He hadn’t been prepared for it then and wasn’t prepared now. Then again, he seemed to have somewhat coped with being a duke, so maybe he could cope with becoming a guardian.

Things were not too bad for now, but Colin didn’t know if he could keep it up.

“Here we go, Your Grace,” the groom said as he led Colin’s horse out. “He’s ready for you.”

“Thank you, Pendleton.” Colin managed to mount with ease, adjusting his gloves before he took a firmer hold of the reins. “I’ll go along my usual route before looping around.”

“Very good, Your Grace. Just be careful when you’re near the road. There was a storm last night, and I’m sure the paths will be unstable.”

“You don’t need to worry about that,” Colin assured him, adjusting his hat before it fell off and tumbled to the ground. “I know my route. I’ll be careful.”

Pendleton didn’t look convinced, but Colin could understand that. He was a mostly competent rider, but he did have his moments where he ended up falling off due to a reckless decision. But the last time he had fallen off had been three years ago, and Colin had got away with a broken arm. He hadn’t been able to do anything with his hand for the best part of six weeks.

Even across an ocean, his mother had scolded him for trying a higher jump than he was used to on a rainy day. He had been lucky that he hadn’t been alone and could get back before he was stuck out in the countryside on his own.

The dowager duchess still thought he was reckless, yet agreed that Colin was the right person to look after Emily. Colin wasn’t sure about the logic there. Nor was he sure if anyone would want to marry someone with his behaviour. Not that he was willing to change much. He wasn’t a bad person, just took decisions in a split second instead of being rational. It wasn’t something ladies were particularly comfortable with, as they preferred a more reasonable way of doing things.

Besides, he had a lot of plans and hobbies, and Colin wasn’t willing to give them up for whoever he married. It was a non-negotiable point for him. Whoever wanted to marry him would have to be content with who he was. Then again, given that he was the Duke of Pellington and considered an eligible bachelor anyway, the ladies would be happy to simply become a duchess and wealthier than before.

Love seemed very overrated, and Colin had come to believe it didn’t exist without an ulterior motive.

It was a nice enough day as he made his way across his estate and through the fields, taking the gentler routes and not doing anything stupid. The last thing he wanted was for people to get upset at him because he was daft, and then Emily had to see him like that. She adored him as an uncle and knew he could get into scrapes despite his age. She thought it was amusing.

But doing it when he was her guardian was definitely not a good idea. Emily’s mood went from happy to sad in a split second, and seeing her uncle get hurt so soon after her parents died was probably not going to help. Eloise had said that children could bounce back but needed the right people around them. Colin hoped that she was right.

Pendleton was right about the rain having caused a bit of an issue. It was softer underfoot – Colin could tell as his horse trotted along – and he saw a bit of a landslide near the road. It was the main one between London an hour away and Pellington, Colin’s home, in the Surrey countryside. If that got blocked, then people would struggle to get through.

Maybe he should go and have a look at what the damage was. The sooner they got it sorted, the better. Otherwise, people would be delayed, and Colin knew that the detour was at least an hour before getting back onto the main road. It was not ideal.

Turning his horse towards the road, Colin urged it to move a little faster. At least he had something to distract himself for a while.

#

“I can’t apologize enough, miss,” the carriage driver said as he straightened up, his expression grim. “But there’s no hope of getting that fixed.”

“So it can’t be put back on?” Charlotte asked.

“That would be a bit difficult. It’s broken completely. And we don’t have any way of getting it fixed.” The driver pointed back along the road. “It must have hit one of the rocks along the road, and it was too much for the wood. That’s all I can think of.”

Charlotte tried to take it in but was still shaking from the impact. The carriage had jerked so suddenly and so hard that she had been thrown against the wall, hitting her head. It was still pounding, and Charlotte wasn’t sure if her head was throbbing or if everything around her was pulsating. It must have been a pretty hard hit if that was happening.

She needed to sit down but felt too jittery for it. At least she had been the only one in the carriage; otherwise, there could have been more injuries with other people. Then again, it might have been a softer impact if Charlotte was around other people.

“Are you alright, miss?” the carriage driver asked as he peered at her. “You’re looking rather pale.”

“I … I’m fine.”

“Maybe you should sit down. You look like you’re going to pass out.”

Charlotte wanted to argue but didn’t want to fight about it. There wasn’t really any fight in her anymore, not after the shock she had received back in London only a few days ago. It couldn’t possibly get any worse. She managed a tiny smile and stepped away.

“I … I’ll sit down, then. Maybe I jarred myself in the accident.”

“Here. Let me.” The driver took off his big red coat and laid it on the grass. “There you are. The grass is still damp, so that should protect you for now.”

“Thank you.”

Charlotte sat down slowly, trying not to move too fast unless it made her light-headed, and settled on the coat as the driver and the young man traveling up top with him checked on the wheel. It was definitely broken, and Charlotte could see that a part of the axle was bent. How it was just that broke and the horses hadn’t been more spooked was a surprise, but Charlotte was just grateful that she wasn’t hurt more than she was. It could have been worse.

It would be just her luck, though.

Things had been going downhill for her after her father’s death just two weeks ago. It had been bad enough to know it was a sudden shock, Jonathan Fitzroy having fallen from the top of a wall while helping put titles on the roof of a house he looked after. Then Charlotte was told after the funeral that Fitzroy couldn’t have a funeral as he desired as he didn’t have the money, and Charlotte was informed that he had to go into a mass grave. She had tried to protest about it, but she didn’t have enough money to change their minds. Then Charlotte heard that her father had so many debts that it would take the rest of her life to pay it all off, and she practically had nothing to live off of. Despite her high status as a supposedly wealthy merchant’s daughter, Charlotte would end up with nothing and face ruin as a result.

Would she have found out about this if her father hadn’t tried to help his tenants with their home? Or would they have gone on in ignorance? Had her father known about the debts or was he in denial that they were that bad? Charlotte wanted a lot of answers, but Fitzroy wasn’t around to give her those. She was left with nothing there, just like everything else in her life.

His businesses were either bankrupted or taken over by his business partners, and nobody was willing to help Charlotte out. They just told her to run along and be a good girl like a child. Charlotte hated how they had treated her, but protesting wouldn’t do her any good. They were the type of people who wouldn’t listen to her plight. They just cared about the money. Nobody cared about the daughter of a supposed friend and business partner.

Charlotte ended up fatherless, penniless, and about to become homeless. She couldn’t let that happen. So Charlotte had sold up what jewellery she had to get a ticket on the carriage to Pellington.

Then she could go to the Duke of Pellington himself and plead for his help. Charlotte was a prideful woman; having to plead with someone for their help and be at their mercy was not something she was comfortable with at all. Especially when it was someone she hadn’t seen for over a decade. The last time Charlotte had met the current Duke of Pellington – Colin, she remembered – they had been eleven and thirteen years old. They had occasionally played together when their fathers interacted – the last duke had been very interested in Fitzroy’s work. Charlotte had suspected that Colin didn’t particularly want to play with her, but he hadn’t complained too much. Given how old they were, he was actually quite respectful. It was why Charlotte sought him out after that, although she tried to pretend it wasn’t the case when Colin confronted her about it. From what she could remember, their interactions had been civil enough. He hadn’t treated her badly, despite having every opportunity to do that.

But it had been eleven years now. Would he recognize her? Would he treat her the same way or see her as the annoying girl he had to play with while the grown-ups talked business? Charlotte hoped that once she finally got there, she would be able to talk to him, and they could come to some sort of agreement. Fitzroy had always told her to go to the duke if anything happened, and she needed help, and he’d do whatever he could to help her. It was an agreement they had made long ago.

But that had been with Colin’s father. Charlotte doubted that Colin knew about that deal himself. She could only hope that he wasn’t going to be cruel towards her.

Charlotte’s head was hurting too much from getting worried over this. She just wanted to get off the road and to the Pellington estate. Colin had to be there, and Charlotte wanted to get this over sooner rather than later. She hated having to rely on anyone for anything. After all, she had relied on her father to look after her and now she was suffering the consequences of that.

The sound of a horse approaching made Charlotte look up, and she saw a horse and rider come onto the road through the trees, riding slowly at first before picking up a quicker trot. The carriage driver went to him and held up a hand in greeting. The rider brought his horse to a halt and leaned over to speak to the other man, and Charlotte watched them for a moment. There was something familiar about the rider. From what she could see of his profile, he looked about her age, and he looked like he was from money. The clothes he wore were clearly expensive. He looked as if he didn’t have any troubles with fortune. Charlotte felt a pang of annoyance and looked away. God, seeing wealthy people was enough to make her feel upset with everything she was going through. It was like people wanted to rub it in her face.

She was glad, yet again, that she had been traveling alone. Seeing all the wealth in the carriage with her would have made the journey even worse.

Charlotte knew there was something wrong with her. But, at this point, she didn’t really care.

She was aware of a horse’s hooves coming closer and kept her gaze on the ground. She didn’t want to interact with the newcomer at all. All Charlotte wanted was to get away from there and not dwell in her embarrassment for much longer.

“Charlotte? Is that you?”

Charlotte stiffened. How did he know her name? She looked up, and the rider began to dismount. She could see him better now. Tall, broad-shouldered, and well-built with curly black hair, a trimmed beard, and gold-flecked brown eyes, the gentleman was certainly a sight to behold.

But those gold flecks in the eyes got Charlotte’s attention. She had seen them before in a specific set of eyes. Ones that she had stared into plenty of times over the years when they were younger.

It couldn’t be. How was it possible?

“Colin?”

Chapter Two

 

Colin couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Was it really Charlotte Fitzroy in front of him? When he had caught sight of her, sitting forlornly on a red coat at the side of the road, he had thought his mind was playing tricks on him. It had been eleven years since they last saw each other, so how could he have recognized her? But then Colin had taken a closer look, and saw the shape of her nose, the delicately-curved features of her profile, the auburn hair that seemed to be falling out of the style it had been pinned up in. He had seen that face many times years ago.

It had been years since he last saw her, but Colin knew it was Charlotte. How could he forget the stubborn, feisty redhead who had goaded him every time he tried to do something until Colin had given up and allowed her to join in with whatever he was doing? Over time, the annoyance towards the girl had turned into admiration. Charlotte knew what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to go after it. Brighter than he thought as well, so they were able to talk and debate many topics. Colin was fine with telling Charlotte anything she didn’t know, and they could discuss it. They had managed to build a friendship, something Colin hadn’t expected. When he last saw her, they had promised to write, but Colin knew neither would follow through on that.

So when there was no letter, Colin had let it go. He put it down to being children. Children weren’t known for holding onto promises, as he knew from personal experience.

Now, she was looking up at him, and Colin knew his initial hunch was correct. This was Charlotte Fitzroy. All grown up. And very beautiful.

Wait, where did that come from? Was he actually considering her beautiful when she was in clear distress? He needed to get his head focused on the more important things.

Colin crouched in front of her, Charlotte staring at him with her mouth open.

“Are you alright?” he asked, his eyes searching her face. “You seem … shaken.”

“I’ll be fine.” Charlotte shook herself and then flinched, putting her hands to her head. “Ow, that really hurt.”

“Did you hurt yourself?”

“I caught my head on the side of the carriage when the wheel broke. It’s given me a headache.”

And a lot more. Charlotte looked like she was in more pain than that.

“I could send for my physician …”

Charlotte shook her head. “I’ll be fine. I just need to rest.”

Colin sighed.

“Now is not the time for you to be stubborn and refuse help. You need someone to ensure you won’t start talking oddly. I’ve heard that happens when you smack your head hard.”

“Talking oddly?” Charlotte arched an eyebrow at him. “You’ve said that I’ve been talking oddly for years.”

Colin couldn’t help smiling at that.

“At least you haven’t lost your sense of humour.”

“I’m surprised you call what I have a sense of humour. I’m sure you called it something a lot worse.”

That made Colin laugh. This was definitely Charlotte. If he had had any doubts before, he didn’t now. That feisty attitude was still fresh and lively as it had been in the past. It was Colin’s main memory regarding the woman before him.

How was it possible they had both grown up?

“Well, I think it’s still a good idea that you come back with me,” he said as he stood up. “You know Pelmore isn’t that far from here, right?”

“I know.” Charlotte took a deep breath as if bracing herself for something. “I was on my way to see you.”

“You were?”

Charlotte chewed hard on her lower lip, but she didn’t respond. However, Colin recognized the movement immediately. It wasn’t often that Charlotte did it, but when she had bitten her lip to this extent before, it had been because she was scared of what she was going to say. It had to be serious if she was doing what Colin called her ‘tell’.

“I … it’s complicated,” she mumbled.

“Do you think you can tell me?”

Charlotte hesitated and then glanced past him towards the two men fixing the carriage, watching them and whispering to each other. Colin had a feeling they were trying to listen in; Pellington was a small place, and everyone loved to gossip and listen in on things that weren’t their business. If you wanted to keep a secret, it was definitely not shared with anyone, even those you trusted, because the wrong person could overhear. Then, it would be all around the village by the end of the day, so Colin was reluctant to share what was going on in his life with anyone. That wasn’t something he wanted to be the subject of gossip.

He held out a hand.

“So, how about you come back with me?”

“What?”

“You were coming to visit me, anyway, weren’t you? Why don’t you come back with me now instead of waiting for the carriage to be fixed?” Colin gestured at the broken wheel. “I don’t see it being fixed anytime soon.”

Charlotte wavered, and Colin saw uncertainness pass across her face. The Charlotte he once knew had rarely been uncertain of anything.

She hadn’t been as pretty as this before. Things do change as you grow up.

Where did that come from? Why am I thinking about that now?

Charlotte swallowed and nodded, squaring her shoulders.

“Alright. But what about my trunk? How are we going to get it back?”

“I’ll see to it. Don’t you worry about it.” Colin gestured at his horse, grazing on the verge nearby. “Do you think you can get up there? I’ll walk you back to the house.”

“I … of course I can.”

Charlotte still sounded uncertain, and Colin smiled.

“You don’t need to be afraid. He’s quite placid.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about,” Charlotte said sharply. “Should we be left alone when I haven’t got a chaperone?”

“You travelled here without a chaperone?” Colin pointed out, looking around. “Are you worried about that now?”

“Well … I …”

Charlotte’s face went bright red, and she looked like she would rather be anywhere but with him right now. Colin could see that her rational thinking was all over the place, and she was doing her best to keep it together. He felt a stab of sympathy for her; whatever was going on had to be bad enough that Charlotte was forgetting something as simple as a chaperone.

How she hadn’t been accosted already and got into trouble was beyond him.

Sighing, Colin looked up at the sky and contemplated his next move. If he was quick, he could get his personal carriage and have it brought out to Charlotte. Then, she would be out of the rain before it decided to descend again; clouds were in the distance and slowly gathering speed. They could get caught in it if they took ages getting back to Pelmore.

“I’ve got a better idea, then. If you’ll step back into the carriage, Charlotte?”

“Why?” Charlotte frowned. “Why would I need to do that?”

“Because then I know that you’re safe and not hovering around on the side of the road. I’m just returning to Pelmore to get my carriage and bring it to you.” Colin shrugged. “If you don’t want to get on my horse and are worried about a chaperone, that’s the best option.”

Charlotte looked as if she wanted to argue, but Colin saw her weighing it up in her mind. She was bright as well as stubborn, and she knew this was the better option. There would be fewer questions if she was out of sight, and those in charge of the carriage had more important things to worry about.

Colin turned to the carriage driver, watching their interaction in bemusement.

“I’ll bring Thompson back with me, Daniels. He’ll help you fix the wheel, and I’ll take Miss Fitzroy with me.”

“Yes, Your Grace.” Daniels bowed. “Any help would be much appreciated. We won’t be able to cope with it on our own.”

“I won’t be long. Just keep Miss Fitzroy safe and warm.”

“Of course. We’ll make sure she’s left alone.”

Charlotte still looked unsure as she picked up the red coat she had been sitting on and tried to hand it to Daniels, but the man held up his hands.

“Hold onto it for now, miss.”

“It’s your coat. You’ll get cold …”

“I’m fine for now, miss. You focus on yourself.”

Colin touched Charlotte’s arm and realized that she was actually shivering. She looked like she had bumps all down her arms and was shaking. He made a mental note to have the physician sent for as soon as he returned; Charlotte was not as fine as she thought she was.

“Charlotte, please. Let’s get you sitting down.”

This time, Charlotte didn’t complain. She went with Colin, and he held the door open for her. Just as she was getting inside, Colin remembered something.

“Where’s your father? Should I make him aware of what happened to you? I’m sure he’s going to be worried.”

Charlotte’s expression went blank, but the look in her eyes held a lot of pain.

“My father’s dead,” she said woodenly.

Then she got into the carriage before Colin could respond, slumping back and wrapping the coat around herself. She hunched over, pointedly not looking at him as she stared out the other window. Stunned by the response, Colin slowly shut the door. Fitzroy was dead? That couldn’t be possible; he had always been very healthy.

Now, he could see why Charlotte was all over the place. Grief made people do a lot of things, either due to forgetfulness or because they were desperate. From what he could tell, it was a bit of both.

And Colin wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do now.

---

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